5 Things Sex and The City taught me about life

I love to re-watch Sex and The City every day on BART to and from work. It's something I do every year.

carrie bradshaw

I did not see the show until 2006. My husband brought back the series for me from one of his business trips. He had been traveling a lot and knew I liked to watch TV series on DVD to pass the time when he was away – obviously that was WAY before I started blogging!

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I instantly fell in love with the girls. And New York. Or at least the New York of SATC. I have only been to New York City once. I was fourteen or fifteen and went with my family on a trip during Thanksgiving. I hope to get to that city (we call San Francisco the city also, so I need to be specific!) sometime this year. I know that I will be going with SATC-colored glasses, so my expectations may be a little high.

This got me thinking about how much the show has impacted my life. In fact, there were many lessons that I learned by watching and re-watching those four women over six years. I thought I would share 5 that I picked up from Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda, and Samantha.

[1]  Bros before hoes – the female version that is.

There were so many examples of women being evil and awful and competitive with their friends. This was the first time I really got to see the strength of female friendships. An unconditional love that no matter what happens, no matter what men come and go, no matter what jobs you get or don't get, no matter what crisis, you can always rely on your friends to support you.

[2]  It's okay to talk about anything.

It was the first time (except for Friends) that I observed women talking about their life experiences, all their experiences. It gave a sense of respectability to women's conversations with other women – from sex toys to female masturbation there was such empowerment in their words. These were not hen sessions behind closed doors but conversations at diner tables or in the back of taxi cabs and it was revolutionary!

I love this quote from Natasha Walter, author of The New Feminism, “SATC expresses the level of sexual confidence that independent women have now without ever suggesting that they are heartless or slutty or out of control.”

[3]  Eating and drinking are part of real life.

Although they were all fairly thin, these girls ate and drank! They were always eating or snacking on something or drinking some kind of alcohol. The only exception was the whole brownie in garbage episode, but you didn't see them diet or complain about their weight (except for the occasional thigh comment from Charlotte!)

[4]  People have short memories.

No one is going to remember that you tripped, stuttered, stumbled, or made a fool of yourself five minutes after you do it. How many disasters did Carrie find herself in which did nothing to deviate from her fabulousness! As someone who finds herself in awkward situations from time to time, it was refreshing to see that Carrie could not be shaken!

[5] You cannot forget The One. And Paris is no fun without That One.

There is always someone. Someone who is in and out of your life. One day you are friends. Another you are not. This relationship defines you. Causes the greatest joy. The greatest anguish. Just when you think The One is out of your system, and you let your guard down, watch out, that's exactly when your life will be disrupted again.

I imagine that Paris can be quite fun for singles. But everyone knows Paris is for lovers. You may think it could be any lover, and maybe it can, but there is something absolutely exhilarating about being in Paris with your one. This is why those last two episodes of Season Six, An American Girl in Paris – Part Une and Part Deux are my favorite!

Those were my takeaways. How about you? Were there lessons you learned from Sex and The City?

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  1. Dear Andi,

    A great post this morning. I really enjoy SATC and actually how real it can be. I am looking forward to their new movie.

    1. @JoAnna, don’t love the movies as much as the series, but I am looking forward to it none-the-less!

  2. corrie howe says:

    I love these lessons, Andi. Of course, I love the last lesson the best and couldn’t agree more. I went o Paris when I was in high school and thought I wanted to come back with The One. He went to Rome during his Navy days and wanted to come back with The One. We found a travel package for both for our honeymoon. Sigh!

    1. @Corrie, both Paris and Rome are magical for that!

  3. Joseph Ruiz says:

    Hey there Andi. I have to say all I know about SATC I learned right here! And my is it interesting. I feel like I got to witness Item 1 and perhaps 3 while in Chicago. You two sure made it extra fun for me. I can just hear the conversation.
    All the best

    1. @Joe – hi there! Glad to see you here!

  4. Sex and the City taught me that a lot of my dating experiences were not that unusual, that many of the men I dated were not just my bad luck but more a regular single girl trial and error process.

  5. As I read this, I couldn’t help but think that our PDC is this girl gang. J is Samantha, for sure. Not sure how the rest of us match up. Would be fun to figure it out sometime!

    1. @Alisa, I think there is some of all 4 of them in all 4 of us!

  6. I beg your pardon, Alisa. I AM CARRIE – okay, with a little Samantha rolled in there.

    Joe – I can’t believe we didn’t treat you to a little #2 – didn’t I tell you about my stable??? I think Andi might have made me close my mouth on that one.

    Andi – brilliant, brilliant. You know how I feel about these women.
    The only thing I’ll add (because I think there’s a word limit in comments) is that I learned that a woman can make a living writing about her life and how she sees it. And that other women (and men) are anxious to hear all about it.

    Bros before hoes – how did I make through life thus far without knowing that phrase. I will use it every day from this point on. Thank you!

    1. @Julie, you never heard of bros before hoes (I ‘m not sure it might be ‘ho’s’!) – it’s ancient and a guy thing – I totally want to make up a female equivalent! Like I told Alisa, I think there is some of all 4 of them in all 4 us, but you definitely have Carrie/Samantha tendencies!

  7. Shoot, I’m boarding my plane, so I can’t write the response that I want to, but I just wanted to say that 1) this is the best post ever, 2) I’m at SATC addict and I’m counting down the days until the movie, and 3) I’m attending this killer SATC VIP party that I’ll definitely do a post on. Thanks for giving me something to think about on my 9 hour flight, yay!!!

    1. @AndiP, a SATC VIP party – jealous!!!! Have a great trip!

  8. Amy Mayfield says:

    Stopping by from The Lady Bloggers’ Tea Party.
    Oh, how I loved Sex and the City and then they made the movie. Which sucked. But I still watched it. And now they’re making another movie. Which will probably suck. And I’ll still watch it.
    The things I learned were mainly about relationships and fashion. And the importance of girl friends.

    1. @Amy, completely agree, sort of. I was not quite in the “it sucks” category, but must say I definitely prefer the show over the movie.